Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Status Epilepticus

Though this website is dedicated to PNES (psychogenic nonepileptic seizures), I am going to post this time on epilepsy. For those of us who have both disorders.

I just returned home from the intensive care unit having somehow allowed my Dilantin level drop to 4. Not sure at this time how I am missing doses, my brother will be staying with me for a few days to see if I'm having petit mals.

This is such a grave reminder to me of the cost - emotional and physical, these disorders are. I am black and blue from the thighs down, I'm not sure why. Fortunately I have Lifeline and that was triggered and rescue came.

I don't really think of my seizures as 'real' as so many medical professionals have reflected to me that they are 'faking'.

I preach how real they are to my readers and patients and support them with their doubts and fears. However I am right there with them, feeling that same ghostly feeling of 'I don't have anything'...

I do believe however while I'm in recovery phase, that the day is coming that we will know what this is, and what is happening in our noggins'. I believe folks like Steven Levine and many like him bridge that unhealthy gap between medicine and psychiatry.

And we will have more access to wholeness.

Be well,

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Happy New Year

With all the New Year's resolutions flying around, mine is to be happy.

I've spent so many years focusing on what is the matter with me and why, I'm just not going to go there anymore. I've worked on it for twenty-something years. Oh sure, I'm aware of childhood issues, my personality flaws, strengths, weaknesses and things I want to change.

While all that goes on, time goes on too. I'm forty eight and just beginning to enjoy being on the planet. Seeing the trailer for "The Bucket List" made me laugh, and though I'm not nearly at that point, I sure am ready to play!

What will your playtime consist of this year? I'd sure like to hear from you.